waiting longer for just a few

We pray, cry and beg God on behalf of our children, our marriages, our friends, or neighbors. Where is He in the midst of this crazy, chaotic, torn -up world? We fight, strain and complain our way through the day seeking God to do the impossible but seeing nothing change in the day to day. 

Just as a mama sees tiny changes on the face of her child over the days and weeks of his first year, yet looking back over the old, worn photos years later, the changes are starke and obvious, this is the way our God has chosen to move most often in our lives.

We want the fast, the now, the big. God wants the heart, the healing, the walk. 

Genesis 11:10-26 displays the line from Seth to Abram like a ribbon through time. The men after Seth each fathered a named son within 29-35 years of their life. Everyone mentioned is also noted to have "had other sons and daughters" as well. Seemingly large families that started at a relatively young age compared to preflood and even to their patriarch, Seth, who fathered his first son at 100 years old.

Then there is Terah. Born to his own father at a young 29 years, the youngest father of this line thus far. 

I imagine Terah grows into a man, seeks a wife and attempts to begin his own family, like all those before him. Maybe he was 35 or 40 the first time he wondered why his bride had not concieved. Maybe by the time he was 50 he was wondering if his line would even continue. Another 20 years pass before his wife's middle would round out with child and a son would be born to this couple. Abram, a son. And then two other sons. But Scripture does not tell that Terah, like his grandfathers, would have other sons and daughters. Nope, just three. And at the ripe old age of 70.

Later we learn that Terah was not seeking the Lord, as Joshua tells is in Joshua 24:2. Terah lived beyond the Euphrates River and worshiped other gods. Yet I find his story compelling. All too often, I find myself waiting longer than I want to for more than I think I get. Like Terah, at times I feel like I am waiting twice as long for half as much yet I begging God for the now and the more. 

God is most often working through the wait and the few.

Terah fathered only three sons, one of which became the first patriach in the line of God's chosen people who would be used by God in a most profound way.

What if the seemingly extra long wait... waiting for our marriage to heal, our child to turn to the Lord, our dream to be reality, our illness to heal... what if in that wait and in that few is the walking with God that brings about the healing, the trust, the usefulness for His kingdom that He has stored up for us all along. 

grace and peace

Receiving help from others can be difficult. Our pride wants to rear up and assume we have it covered. Like a two year old, we think, "I'm fine. I don't need help." And we proceed headlong into a project that proves otherwise; often leaving us looking like fools.
Not only can receiving be tough, but so can giving. Sometime it is easier to give to strangers than to give to those we love the most. Crazy, but true. I am quicker to bake cookies for the new neighbor than to remember to bake my husband's favorite brownies. I can easily say yes to taking a meal to a sick friend but find my heart grumbles when 4:30 rolls around AGAIN and I have no plans on what to make for dinner tonight.
But as 1 Thessalonians opens, along with most of Paul's letter greetings, we find he, Silvanus and Timothy giving freely to those they love...those in the Thessalonian church. They are freely offering grace and peace in that first scroll of the hand on the page.
"Paul, Silvanus, Timothy, to the church of the Thessalonians in God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ: Grace to you and peace."
Over and over Paul extends this gift of grace and peace to the churches he writes to. This is not just a traditional greeting. But by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, it is intentional wording. it is extended to all believers through all time. Grace. Peace.
See the grace and peace Paul speaks of is not from Paul. It is from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. So it can extend through all time and pulsate right in the heart of our mundane lives.
Grace. It is a leaning in and towards, from God towards me. Right here in the choices and attitudes and decisions of my day. Jesus leans into me. Question is, am I willing to lean into Him?
Pausing to pray rather than check social media.
Running to Him with the decisions of my day rather than picking up the phone.
Meditating on a verse He is teaching me rather than flipping on the TV.
Nothing is wrong with social media, per say, it just robs me of leaning into Jesus when I need Him most, if I choose the easy over the eternal.
Peace. This is not the peace that comes when all is well. Rather it is the peace that comes when all is not well. Peace of mind when circumstances are twisting. When I'd rather yell at the kids or run away or just eat more cake...peace comes when I look to Jesus rather than turn to selfishness.
These are gifts Paul extends to the church. they are gifts Jesus extends to you and me today, too. Grace. Peace. It is up to me to receive them. Those who have received grace, extend it. Those who have received peave, extend it.
If I am leaning into Jesus and keeping my eyes on Him, then it will be evident. Not to those I can fake it with, but those right here in my home and who know me best.
Am I extending grace to my husband when he upsets me? Am I walking through my day with peace and rest in my spirit when my kids argue or push my buttons? Keeping my eyes on Jesus is the only way to open our day with the grace and peace Paul extends in the opening of 1 Thessalonians.

Oh Lord, work this into my own heart.

focus on this

Where your focus is, your heart will follow. I have heard this before in many places, but it was highlighted this morning in my time in the opening portion of Genesis 11.

Many are familiar with the story of the Tower of Babel, how the men of the land of Shinar find the area and settled there. They begin to consult with one another rather than with the Lord. "They said to one another, 'come, let us make bricks and burn them throughly.'" (Genesis 11:3 ESV)

I imagine one guy tells another and they begin to work on their plan and others join in and no one has turned their eyes to the Lord as weeks pass. The bricks gather and the men work hard, not even realizing all their effort is in vain.

Psalm 127 reminds us, "Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain."

As the piles of brick grow and their focus on self increases, the men then consult with one another again, "Come let us build ourselves a city and a tower with its top in the heavens, and let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be dispersed over the face of the whole earth." (Genesis 11:4 ESV)

How quickly our focus turns to self. We are so full of self that we are drowning in the depression, the sadness, the pridefulness, the selfishness. Our eyes are too enamored with what we see in the mirror to turn them upward to the only One worth gazing at. We think self loathing and shame help us be humble when all the while we are still self focused. We build towers to the heavens only to be our own gods and all the while our souls are rotting away in the sin of it all.

Oh to have the heart of the psalmist! "I lift up my eyes to the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth." (Psalm 121:1 ESV)

So where is your focus today? Are you navel gazing or hill gazing?

How does we turn these eyes back to the One we were made to look to? What if we literally looked up, cried out and asked Him, "Open my eyes, that I may behold wonderous things out of Your law. Fix my eyes on Your ways." (Psalm 119:18, 16 ESV) He just might do as He promises and meet us where we are and give us eyes to see.

teaching not just telling

Recently, the passage in Exodus 4 where God is calling Moses to something beyond him, was brought to my attention. I haven't been able to stop mulling it over.  This is the place where,

after proving His Presence by showing Moses the miraculous sight of a burning bush that isn't being consumed, God gives Moses his next assignment.

"Go to Pharaoh that you may bring My people out of Egypt."

Daunting, impossible task for this has-been palace dweller turned shepherd. But God gives him a magnificent assurance. "I will be with you." God Himself was intending to go with Moses every step of the way. He is a Present God who never leaves or forsakes us. But this Truth wasn't enough for ole' Moses. He kept pressing the Lord. He kept looking at himself rather than looking at his God.

Don't we do this sometimes? Don't we spend more time navel gazing and working on the excuses of why we shouldn't and can't do the very thing God is saying: "Yep this task- this one is for you. I have done this more times than I care to remember. Always pondering if and how I can do something rather than just trusting the God Who knows me better than I know myself and calls me to a task in order to bring Him glory.

Moses tries to pre-think, something I am good at too.

"I am not eloquent (who said eloquence was required?)" Moses explains to the One who made his tongue. God reminds him of that very truth: "Yes, I know, I made you, remember?"

And then God tells Moses something that has been flashing in my mind these last couple weeks.

"Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak."(Exodus 4:12, ESV)

God did not intend to TELL Moses what to say to Pharaoh. He intended to TEACH Moses what to say. He intended to TEACH him how to lead and bring His people out of their captivity.

This is especially interesting because Moses, was in a self-made captivity of sorts when God met him in the wilderness. Moses had sinned, failed God and his people. He had murdered a man and out of fear and conviction he ran. I wonder if, in a way, he was doing what Adam did in the Garden--run and hide. Unseen among the sheep in the Judean wilderness, he likely felt he was secluded. Until the One who sees all saw him and appeared to place a calling on him far beyond his imagination.

God does that you know. He calls the messed up, broken sinner to accomplish His purposes. He calls us with a divine calling to His glory and excellence, knowing FULL WELL our failures, mistakes, sins, and short-comings.

Why? Why bother? I really think it's like He told Moses, He desires to TEACH us what to say, write, do whatever so that we, the weak and broken, display His grace and goodness in a way that draws others to Him.

So what is He calling YOU to do? What is the assignment you feel unworthy to walk in? He finds us in the very wilderness where we're trying to hide and comes with a calling so He might teach us to display His goodness and grace for all to see and glorify our Father in Heaven.

run or fight

Just wanted to share a word of encouragement from my time in Psalm 78 this morning.

Whether you are going through major trials in this season, like illness or marital struggles, or if you are about to start another school year with your homeschooled children or sending your young adult child off to college for the first time, Psalm 78 has a word for us.

In verse 9 it says the Ephraimites armed with the bow, turned back on the day of battle.

They were well armed. They had their bows ready. Yet when the going got tough, they turned back. They turned away from the battle for which they were armed. This is what they were armed for!

Those of us in Christ are also armed for the battle. Ephesians 6 tells us to put on the full armor of God to be ready when the fiery darts of the enemy come for us. We have the armor we need, and yet, we often back down from using it in the very battles we face.

Those of us in Christ can put on the belt of Truth, the breast plate of righteousness, the shoes of peace, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation with the sword of the Spirit in our hand. But then we have to apply it, use it, go with confidence into the battle ahead.

The hard battle is to keep our heart and mind on truth, making the God honoring choices, standing on truth when our feeling argue, being guarded with the faith that says I act as if God is telling the truth. We will remember truth and trust God over our own feeling and fears when we get the bad news or walk through the scary seasons or have to relinquish our child to what the Lord has for him.

So let's put on the armor and then go forth in this battle knowing He has seen us through trials before and will do so again for His great glory and good.

What is so interesting is that this verse is right here in the midst of this generational theme.

But after praying this through with the Lord, it makes perfect sense...passing on our faith to the next generation is certainly a huge battle. But it is not one that we have to lose. It is one that Jesus has won. He arms the next generation too! But we have to be faithful to tell them and to pray for them. As the battle rages before us in this media driven world and as our kids (and us!) are attacked from all angles, remember your armor! Stand firm, do not shrink back, you are armed. So will you run or fight?